Many people get up in the morning, take a shower, and brush their teeth before they start their day.
Showering and brushing one’s teeth are habits so common and routine that we often do not realize we are doing them.
The definition of habit, according to the Oxford English Dictionary, is a settled or regular tendency or practice, especially one that is hard to give up.
But what if we wanted to establish a new habit, a practice that would benefit us in the long run, like exercising or giving up biting our nails. The beginning of a new year is usually a good time to set new goals or habits.
Paulette Rao is an International Coach Federation Master Certified Coach who teaches in the Executive Certificate in Leadership Coaching program at the University of Miami’s Division of Continuing and International Education. She teaches people leadership skills to succeed in their organizations.
Although many believe that “you cannot teach an old dog new tricks,” Rao said contemporary neuroscience research shows that new ways of thinking and new habits can take place at any age.
“It just takes time, attention, and getting positive feedback,” she said.
Experts also say that it is important not to despair if one messes up or fails at first. Never giving up is essential to establishing new habits.
Here are a few tips on how you can make new habits:
Visualize
Before you start on your new habit, it helps to visualize what you want to achieve, Rao said. “For instance, if you want to stop biting your nails, visualize healthy-looking, neat hands,” she said. This exercise will help continue the process.
Motivation
Once you have visualized how you will look and feel when you create the habit, this will promote motivation, which is crucial in maintaining a habit. “Without motivation, nothing can happen,” said Rao. Remembering the purpose and importance of the new behavior can also be helpful in maintaining motivation, experts said.
Start small
Many people want to establish new goals or habits, but their goals are too rigorous. “For instance, they say ‘starting tomorrow, I will go to the gym every day,’” Rao said. “But when habits are so vast, most people cannot fulfill them, so they doom themselves to failure,” she continued. When you break down the habits into chunks, there are less excuses for not carrying them out. Try going to the gym twice a week first and then increase the frequency from there.
Tools
Make sure you have the equipment you need to carry out the goal or exercise. “If you want to run, make sure you have good running shoes,” she said. “If you want to swim, then make sure you have all that you need, including goggles and swimsuit.”
Find a buddy
Being accountable to someone or a group increases your chances of fulfilling a goal or habit. That is why groups such as Weight Watchers or Alcoholics Anonymous have been around for so many years, experts said. Find a friend or a group of friends who know what you are trying to achieve. Their feedback and encouragement will help establish the habit.
Emotional habits
Breaking away from emotional habits and establishing new ones can also be carried out if the person follows proper preparation, she said.
“Let’s say that you are the kind of person who easily angers when someone is rude or contrary. Instead of reacting, you should pause, take a breath, and say: ‘Maybe that is not directed at me but at something he/she is going through,’” Rao shared.
That kind of thinking helps you to walk away from the situation and avoid escalating it.
In other words, you modify your behavior, she said.